All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
A Different Kind of Love « Thread Started on Jan 19, 2008, 6:46am »
A Different Kind of Love
I apologise in advance for this.
It was sugested on one of the discussion thread that someone write a fic/ crack!fic where Abby is paired with a tree. Well, i was splatted. So I took it upon myself to write this dreadful fic. I am truly sorry.
Pairing: Abby/Alan Warnings: Nothing serious, unless you think I am a freak. Any warnings you can suggest for this? Rating: PG-13
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #1 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:46am »
Chapter 1
“Abby,” McGee tried to reason with the fuming forensic scientist. “I am sorry, I completely forgot.” He begged, following her around the lab.
“It won’t go away as easily this time McGee. I can’t believe you forgot Habitat for Humanity, again” she scowled, turning on him and penetrating his skull with angry daggers.
“Abs…” he tried to reason.
“Don’t ‘Abs’ me McGee.” She warned, taking a threatening step towards him. “You forgot.” She crossed her arms and furrowed her brow.
“Abby I am sorry. But something came up and I forgot that was yesterday, I thought it was next week!” he pleaded, bending down to try and catch a glimpse of her eyes.
“I am sorry McGee. I will never forgive you.” She spun on her heels so only her back was visible to him.
“Abby…” he tried not to sob.
“No Tim. Never again. Goodbye.” She never turned, but still ordered him forcefully out of the lab.
“But I brought you a Caf-Pow…” he trailed off, gazing down solemnly at the gigantic cup in his left hand.
“Timmy!” Abby squeaked, throwing herself onto McGee. “I love you!” she kissed his cheek and ripped the cold cup from the junior agent’s hand.
“Are we ok?” he asked, surprised at her sudden change of opinion.
“Of course. Now, yesterday,” she began her long story of her eventful Sunday. “We had a very surprising day.” They sat crossed-legged on the sterile floor as Abby took a long draw on her straw before continuing. “We were building a house down by the river when we found out a huge oak tree was in the way. Of course we were not going to cut it down, but we had to find a solution. We built around it.” She beamed, eyes glinting with suspense. “The house is a little smaller than expected, but it’s residents now have a massive tree in the garden.” She grinned, and stared into McGee’s captivated eyes.
“Now I am more sorry I missed it than ever.” He pouted, staring at the floor.
“I know, but the good news is I am here to tell you about it.” She smiled at the defeated man. The thing she hadn’t told him was that she was returning to visit the tree this afternoon; with the quietness and solitude that they deserved.
She couldn’t wait.
--------------------------
That Afternoon
“Hello?” Abby hoped the white picket fence surrounding the garden and walked slowly over the grass. There was no reply, but she easily spotted the giant oak in the corner of the garden. “I said hello.” She repeated herself, placing a soft hand on the hard bark.
“Hello.” An extremely deep voice growled back, and Abby felt the tree moved under her palm.
“How nice to see you again.” She greeted, moving around to what she figured to be the front of the tree.
“Ah,” he sighed in recognition. “I noticed you here yesterday, you are very beautiful.” His deep voice complemented her and he gazed in admiration.
“Thank you.” She nodded, running her eyes up and down the dark bark.
“What is your name?” he asked sweetly, staring into her deep, green eyes.
“Abby.” She beamed as his branches rustled.
“That is a very beautiful name.” he stated, wondering why such a beautiful human would talk to an old tree like him.
“And yours?” she asked back, a grin covering her face.
“Leucobalanus Quercus” he stated matter-of-factly.
“That certainly is a mouthful.” She flirted, swinging her arms.
“You, Abby, can call me Alan. It is, after all, part of my name.” he joked at the young goth, who seemed to be mesmerised by him.
“Ok then Alan.” She nodded, replacing her hand on his bark.
“What brings you to my humble home on this sunny day?” he asked politely.
“I wanted to see you again, Alan. You caught my attention yesterday while we were working.”
“Yes, I thought it rather kind of you to request the build around me. I am glad you spared my life Abby.” He thanked her gratefully, his deep voice resounding through her head.
“You are quite welcome, it was my pleasure. I am sorry that I can’t stay longer, but I have to get back to work. Is there a certain time of day that suits you for my next visit?” she asked, placing her hands on her hips.
“Any time would suit me if you would like to return. I enjoy your company very much.” He spoke, and she heard the smile in his voice.
“You are so sweet, Alan!” she cocked her head to the right. “I would love to come and visit again.”
“I can’t wait.” He told her as she walked round him and back towards the fence. “Goodbye Abby!” he called after her as she gracefully jumped over the fence and started up her hearse.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #2 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:47am »
Chapter 2
“Where did you go off to?” McGee asked as Abby reentered the lab; he had been sitting at her desk for the past 10 minutes.
“I was out, Timmy. I do have a life.” She smirked jokingly at him, yanking him from the chair and sitting down herself. “Now where was I?” she restarted her computer and spun repeatedly around on the black chair.
“Ok,” McGee muttered to himself, offended that she could dismiss him so easily. “As long as you are alright.”
“I am good Tim, I am good.” She grinned sheepishly, imagining the tall, dark and handsome tree that she had become pleasantly acquainted with.
“What is that!” he cried, throwing his arm out and pointing frantically into her hood. “Is that a leaf!?” he cried, outraged.
“No Tim! No!” she cried, grabbing the leaf from her black hood and hiding it in her palm.
“Abby. Don’t lie to me.” He ordered her, staring commandingly into her deep eyes.
“I am sorry!” she sobbed, opening her palm to reveal the fingered leaf.
“You saw that tree didn’t you?” he asked, half angry half hurt.
“I did.” She bowed her head. “He is so friendly McGee, you would love him.” She tried, and failed, to stop the happy grin spreading itself over her face.
“It is a tree Abby. No different from any other tree.” He tried to assure her, crouching down by her knee.
“But Alan is different Tim, there is something about him…” she gazed into space, trying to convince her best friend.
“Alan?” he questioned, confused.
“Yeah, that is his name.” she spoke dreamily.
“It has a name?” McGee raised his eyebrows and wrinkled his forehead.
“His full name is Leucobalanus Quercus, but he has asked me to call him Alan. You should see him McGee. He is really tall, he has this beautiful rough bark and his voice is so soothing and so amazingly deep. Think Barry White an octave lower…” she trailed off, her voice softening at the wonderful thoughts she was thinking.
“He sounds dreamy…” McGee grinned, imagining the mental image of the great oak.
“Oh he is...” her eyes were dilated and unfocused. “But no!” she yelled, snapping out of her daydream. “He is mine! You can’t have him!” she jumped up and assumed a defensive stand.
“Please Abby? Can’t I just meet him once? We might hit is off…” he begged, trying to reason with his frantic friend.
“No McGee, please don’t make me…” she sobbed, afraid of losing her new friend to him. What if Alan liked McGee better than her? He was taller after all, and timothy was also a beautiful name, something Alan seemed to like. “He is mine. Please, just let us be happy. Don’t you want that for me?” she asked softly.
“Of course…” he placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “If you are happy, I am happy.” He smiled weakly, brushing her hair form her face.
“Thank you McGee.” She wrapped her arms stiffly around his neck and squeezed tightly. “It means a lot to me.” She let him go and fell back into her seat.
“And I wish you all the best in this Abs, but I have to go. Gibbs’ll be mad.” He blushed.
“Ok McGee. Talk to you later.” She waved gently. “And Tim,” she interrupted his walk and he turned to stare her in the eye. “Thank you.” She told him softly, but loud enough to hear.
“Any time Abby.” He smiled before entering the elevator and returning to the bullpen.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #3 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:48am »
Chapter 3
“Alan?” Abby called, using the white wood gate to enter the luscious garden this time. She had dressed up for the most anticipated meeting of her entire week. She had completely decked herself out for a man she had only met two days ago. Very un-Abby. She wore a black mini-skirt and a tight black shirt under her long leather coat. She had deliberately left the top 2 shirt buttons undone and exposed as much leg as possible to try and win the heart of the great oak.
“Abby?” he groaned quietly. “Is that you?” his deep voice echoed around the garden with outstanding clarity.
“It is my dear.” She purred, nearing the dark tree.
“I was not expecting another visit so soon, what a pleasant surprise.” She heard him beam as she moved in front of him. “Whoa, you look amazing. Have you somewhere else to go?” he asked disappointedly as she ran her hand up and down his bark.
“No I don’t.” she smiled sweetly; relieved she was winning him over.
“You did this for me?” he asked surprised. He never expected to win the heart of his dark beauty.
“Of course my love. You deserve it.” She growled seductively. If this worked on her tall crush, she would have to send Tony a bouquet of black roses, he was the one who taught her how to dress sluttily if the occasion called for it.
“You didn’t need to Abby, I would love…like you in whatever you were wearing.” He mentally slapped himself for his stupid slip up. Now she would know how he felt, and he wasn’t sure if he was ready for that. What if she didn’t feel the same? He could not have his sap drunk and branches broken again; not after the last time.
“What did you say?” she asked, taken aback. Maybe she didn’t need to try as hard as she had anticipated.
“I said you look beautiful in anything.” He tried to cover his mistake. Badly.
“You said you would love me…” she stuttered, trying not to fall out of her shirt.
“Well, I am sorry if that scares you…” she could imagine Alan’s cheeks blushing and he nervously tried to get her to stay with him.
“It doesn’t.” Abby forced her nervous self to admit. “I love you Alan.” She confessed, speaking so fast all her words were slurred together. She struggled not to blush, a vibrant red colour that clashed with her pale cheeks. Blushing to Abby went hand in hand with crying; she didn’t do it. Never ever ever.
“I love you too Abby.” He whispered, his deep voice cracking. Abby took another step towards the large tree and pressed her body to his. She wrapped her arms around his bark covered trunk and held on tightly.
“This is all I ever wanted.” She told him softly and Abby felt a heavy branch connect gently with her lower back.
“I hope you don’t mind…” Alan trailed off embarrassedly, hoping the beautiful human would not be repulsed by his wooden touch.
“Not at all, I really like it. I feel safe with you Alan.” She confessed to him, hoping her would listen to her worries.
“I hope you are telling the truth Abby, ‘cause I want you to feel safe and secure with me.” He tried desperately not to cry; sap was a bitch to get off.
“I wouldn’t lie to you Alan, I do trust you.” She snuggled into the hard bark.
“Thank you Abby. You have no idea how happy you have made me.” His voice jumped repeatedly, and Alan struggled to control it.
“Me too Alan, me too.” She lowered her voice to a whisper so anyone who could possibly be listening could hear. Alan was about to justify his love even more when a shrill beeping erupted from somewhere on Abby’s person. Alan didn’t see where she had hidden it, but he managed to view her as she flipped the phone open and read the text message. “That was my boss. I have to get back to work. I am sorry honey.”
“Don’t be, I know how important your job is to you. I will see you later, my love.” He watched her walk towards the white picket fence.
Abby opened the gate and turned back to the great oak. “Until tomorrow, my dear.” She smiled, stepped out of the garden and locked the gate behind her.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #4 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:48am »
Chapter 4
“Abby!” McGee shrieked, storming into her lab. His face was painted with worry, how was he going to break this to Abby?
“McGee, what’s wrong?” she jumped up frantically from her desk and ran through the pneumatic doors to her fidgety colleague. “Are you ok?” she placed a hand on either arm of the man and looked deeply into his eyes, trying to read him.
“No, Abby I am sorry” he panted.
“What’s happened Tim?” she spoke slowly, afraid of what he was going to say.
“It’s Alan,” he gasped and watched as all the colour drained from her face. “There is a problem.” He said slowly, trying to word the sentence in a calming way.
“Is Alan alright?” she let go of McGee and fell backwards in shock.
“You better see this for yourself.” He grabbed her by the hand and pulled her to the elevator.
-----------------------
McGee pulled Abby into the deserted bullpen and flipped on the plasma. Abby watched as McGee changed the picture from the rotating NCIS badge to the local news channel. She tried to figure out what was happening as the blond reporter moved into position in front of the camera with a white house in the background.
“Oh my God,” Abby whispered when she noticed the great oak tree in the corner of the garden.
“Abby,” Tim tried to explain, but she interrupted.
“McGee,” she tried not to sob. “What is going on?”
“Alan’s roots stretch under the house and make it dangerous.” She bowed him head.
“You mean…”
“Yeah. They are gonna cut him down. I’m sorry Abby.” McGee shook his head at her, and partly himself.
“You’re lying.” She sobbed. “You are just jealous.” She wiped her eyes with the back of her right hand.
“Abby, I am not joking. Listen.” He grabbed up the remote and turned the volume of the news channel up.
“I am Susan Smith and this is channel 4 news.” The blond woman told the camera. “I am standing outside a house that the organization, Habitat for Humanity, built this weekend.” She pushed her earpiece further into her head with 2 fingers. “Apparently they did not count on the tree being in the garden…” she continued.
“His name is Alan!” Abby yelled over her, but was quieted by McGee who wanted her to listen to the rest of the report.
“So, they built around it. Unfortunately, the great oak is extremely old and it’s roots extend all the way under the new house, making it unstable and dangerous if they grow any more.” She beamed, waiting for instructions from the studio.
“What action are they taking to make the house safer Susan?” a squeaky male voice asked from headquarters.
“Well, you might be able to see the crew behind be John.” She indicated to 5 or 6 men sporting florescent orange waistcoats. “They are here to cut the tree down.”
“No!” Abby yelled at the plasma screen.
“There are already protesters here, John.” The camera spun to show a group of angry hippies, all of whom were holding up giant signs insulting the crew or brandishing messages of peace. The camera man was roughly pulled back and refocused on the jealous blond woman who had pulled him back.
“Have the made any threats or acted towards you or the demolition crew, Susan?” the squeaky man asked the tussled blond woman.
“Not yet, John. But I have a bad feeling more to come. The death of this great oak tree will be a loss to the town, and I know that many residents are against the destruction. Back to you in the studio.” She finished and McGee turned off the plasma.
“Come on Tim,” Abby grabbed him by the lapels and dragged him to the elevator. “We have to get down there!”
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #5 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:48am »
Chapter 5
Abby and McGee jumped from her hearse and problematically pushed through the protesters to just behind the news crew. “Let me through!” she yelled, frolicking strongly as to make it to the white picket fence.
“Miss, you can’t go in there.” A man wearing a bright orange jacket barricaded her way. Abby stared at him with a glare Gibbs would be scared of. Her face flushed in anger and even McGee was reluctant to talk to her.
“I am going in there…Jake.” She spit spitefully as she pessimistically read his white nametag.
“Ma’am…” he stuttered, but was interrupted by the agitated goth.
“DO NOT CALL ME MA’AM!” she shrieked, pushing him back and darting towards the fence. Out of nowhere, two other workers from the demolition team barred her way, looking pissed off.
“You can’t go in there, it is dangerous.” They commanded. “You could get hurt.”
“I don’t care! I have to save Alan!” she screamed, attempting to climb the fence.
“Abby!” McGee’s voice boomed in her ear as he pulled her from the fence. He wanted her to be happy, but not at the expense of her own life.
“McGee, what are you doing? We have to save him!” she tried desperately not to sob as she watched a big man approach her love with a chainsaw.
“Miss, do you mean there is someone in there?” the tall black man asked apprehensively.
“Yes! Alan! You can’t cut him down!” she cried, tears forming at the corners of her eyes.
“You mean the tree?” he screwed up his face in confusion and gazed at the young woman as if she was mad. Abby threw a glance at her love and saw him slowly, as fast as the great oak could move, struggling against his attackers.
“ALAN!” Abby screamed to the old tree, attempting to run to him. Her attempt was unsuccessful; the two crewmen still blocked her way and McGee wrapped a strong arm around her waist to stop her endangering her self.
“Abby? Is that you?” the great oak moaned, hearing her sweet voice.
“It is my love.” She called back, her gravelly voice comforting him in his time of need.
“What’s going on? I have a bad feeling in my roots…” he trailed off in a worried fashion, unsure about the current circumstances.
“That’s the problem Alan; your roots stretch under the house…” she began to tear up. “They are going to cut you down!” she cried, turning to McGee and sobbing on his shoulder, leaving big wet patches on his new shirt.
“What?” he managed to push out, the shock altering his voice box.
“I can’t stop them!” she screamed, struggling against McGee. He wanted his best friend to be happy, but not if it meant she would be harmed in the process.
“Abby,” Alan began his goodbye as the huge man fired up the chainsaw. “I love you.”
“I love you too! Please don’t leave me!” she began to forcefully hit McGee’s chest in anger. McGee didn’t stop her; he knew she had to get it out, even if that did cause him physical pain.
“I don’t want to, but there is nothing I can do. Please, stop hurting your friend. I don’t want it to end like this!” she heard his voice crack in fear and love. The chainsaw revved a few times as it neared Alan’s trunk. “Goodbye my love!” she called one last time to the love of his life as the rotating chain cut through is bark.
“Alan!” she screamed as she saw the chainsaw disappear painfully into his trunk. His voice jumped 3 octaves as he screamed in agony at his dismemberment. Abby couldn’t watch anymore; she turned and buried her face in McGee’s chest.
McGee felt her flinch and begin to cry again as the great oak fell dead into the green grass. “Abby, he’s…” McGee tried to comfort her, but was interrupted.
“I know McGee!” she screamed angrily, unable to look into the garden. “Will you do something for me Tim?” she asked him, softly.
“Anything.” He replied shortly, wrapping his arms around her. Abby leaned onto her toes and whispered her request in his ear.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing
Joined: Jan 2008 Posts: 13,223 Karma: 443
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #6 on Jan 19, 2008, 6:49am »
Epilogue
Abby lay stiffly in her dark wood coffin and pulled the heavy lid shut. She sighed as she placed her head on the white satin pillow.
“Goodnight.” She yawned, sliding her eyes shut slowly.
“Night, Abby.” The deep voice growled, comforting her.
“Sweet dreams Alan.” She sighed, rolling onto her side.
Abby drifted off to sleep and let the warm wood comfort her, smiled as she imagined his deep breathing. The hard wood embraced her and lulled her into a sense of security, something she had always wanted and needed.
She was a party girl all right, but deep inside she wanted a normal life. A loving husband, a couple of kids and, most of all, security. She now had this and was hoping to get the rest very soon.
She fell into a deep sleep and let the tree she loved to much hold her all night.
Turning Alan into a new coffin had been her best idea yet.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #7 on Jan 19, 2008, 10:29am »
Geez you have alot of completed stories...
I don't think I'll comment on all of them just now (stupid essay to do! ) but I just had to comment on this one.
I still can't believe you actually wrote this. It was very sweet and I really liked it...and it was SOOOOOOO strange!! Especially the fact that she turned Alan into a new coffin...lol
Well done, you may be crazy; but you know we love you for it
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Joined: Jan 2008 Gender: Female Posts: 6,185 Location: Wiltshire, UK Karma: 549
Re: A Different Kind of Love « Reply #15 on Apr 26, 2008, 6:32pm »
Just read, Rach. Where the hell did this com from!!!!!! And this is the second falling in love with a tree fic I have read today!!!!!
As Crazy as this one is, I love all you fics, and this one is so weird its awesome. I LOVE the ending where she has him made into her coffin, that is such an Abby thing to do!
Love it, hun
« Last Edit: Apr 26, 2008, 6:33pm by sunset_leaf »
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
Barb told me to advertise Go on, Click it. You know you want to... Barb: Rach, my heavens, girl. Seek therapy. Fred: You and your dark side are very, very scary.
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) but I just had to comment on this one. 
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Weird!
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